Babeland, I used to think you were so cool.

For those of you just joining this realm of sex-positive reality, let me give you a bit of history. Toys in Babeland, a feminist sex toy store that opened in the Capitol Hill neighborhood of Seattle in the early 1990’s, grew to a catalog an then online business. It inspired many feminist sex toy stores around the nation, offering sex-positive resources and information, along with classes. I worked briefly as a sex educator here at the Seattle store, but the times were starting to change, and so Toys in Babeland became Babeland, and their funky, black and red color scheme changed to the retro ’80’s CMYK. The funky, locally designed window displays (which were hugely popular, and neighborhood-y) were replaced with corporate slick design. Then came the Babeland branded crap — t-shirts, over-priced grocery sack, water, massage oil and bath products. The friendly faces I worked with have all but disappeared in the 2 yrs since I walked through the doors. Even more upsetting, I am no longer greeted when I enter the door.

What’s upsetting about this is that they used to greet EVERYONE. Welcome, mingle, ask if you needed help, and offer assistance and advice, usually with care and enthusiasm towards education. No one barely gets eye contact, and sometimes help is impossible to find. I noticed during the last time I breezed in that the stock of books was significantly decreased, the amount of Babeland brand merchandise was increased, the “SM forest” which used to have a formidable stock was dwindled to near useless, and added (much to my sex-positive and feminist dismay) was PLASTIC PENIS COVERED STRAWS. That’s right, the kind you’d find in Spencer’s.

I asked the girl at the counter, “what’s up? What happened?” She explained they had moved some stock to the back because they were replacing the carpet. I then asked what was up with the stock, I noted the change, and she immediately got on the defensive: she, it turns out, was the new buyer. She stated they were moving some things out. I asked if this was a corporate decision, and all she could say was something to the effect that this had nothing to do with the change in buyers.

I did not feel that I or my dollars were welcomed in the store. I found it hard to distinguish Babeland from the flourescent lighted adult store “Castle” that is located across the street from my house. Sure, it had that bit of alternative-sexuality-as-a-brand going on, but I felt like I had walked into the Martha Stewart or Oprah of sexuality — if there’s a story in a magazine on the Rabbit Habit, there’s a name-check of Babeland, and Babeland is the brand name for the lifestyle they’re selling.

I’m disappointed and rather disgusted. I wasn’t happy when I parted w/ Babeland. It was largely a choice of a new job in my field that severed my relationship with them, but I’d also witnessed 3 managers in 3 months, a disgruntled staff (some who had been around for a number of years) and a rather ridiculous money-handling and sales-person training and standards (which was very different than my corporate experience of 9 or so years.) There was a lack of support in fostering long term employee happiness, cultivating skills and thereby, influencing low-turnover (and shrink). After my brief time there, I can safely say that if I had to work in retail again, for whatever reason, I’d choose Starbucks or Whole Foods Market, with all their problems and ethical issues combined. Maybe that’s why those companies are on the Fortune 100 Best Places to Work.

Despite getting a discount at Babeland (I’m eligible at least for my KEXP membership), I think I will take my business elsewhere. I’m not buying a brand, a lifestyle or an image. Sometimes, I’m just looking for a feminist book that I can’t find on the shelves of another book store. Sometimes I’m looking for a bit more.

It’s kind of sad. Actually, it kind of makes me angry — but poor customer service will do that to a person.